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I have a bad cold which fakely seemed to be wearing away. it's here and it's here to stay.
then, my so called new friend who seemed to be insanely enthusiasted about me suddently started to ignore my existance. okay, maybe not so suddenly, he's been doing that for the whole week. nowere to be seen, unreachable by phone and social media... if i didn't get his recent picture in my facebook feed, i'd assume something has happened to him and call the cops.
my uni is thoroughly draining everything i have left inside, every vital juice, everything that keeps me ticking. ain't that great news.
i have wasted the entire day and now that i should be going to bed, now I'm awfully hungry.
oh and there's the little thing inside me WANTING TO GRUESOMELY KILL EVERY RETROVIRUS AND THEIR BABIES AND THEIR FAMILIES AND DISTANT RETROVIRUS RELATIVES BECAUSE I CANNOT BREATHE FOR FUCK'S SAKE HELP ME
*sorry. it's not good news, just sarcasm.
then, my so called new friend who seemed to be insanely enthusiasted about me suddently started to ignore my existance. okay, maybe not so suddenly, he's been doing that for the whole week. nowere to be seen, unreachable by phone and social media... if i didn't get his recent picture in my facebook feed, i'd assume something has happened to him and call the cops.
my uni is thoroughly draining everything i have left inside, every vital juice, everything that keeps me ticking. ain't that great news.
i have wasted the entire day and now that i should be going to bed, now I'm awfully hungry.
oh and there's the little thing inside me WANTING TO GRUESOMELY KILL EVERY RETROVIRUS AND THEIR BABIES AND THEIR FAMILIES AND DISTANT RETROVIRUS RELATIVES BECAUSE I CANNOT BREATHE FOR FUCK'S SAKE HELP ME
*sorry. it's not good news, just sarcasm.
...1 year later
I can't believe I haven't written any more entries for an entire year. Guess life totally buldozed over me. Hell. *shudders*
Either way, I am fine, alive, still at uni (which holds the potential of me soon becoming less fine and less alive bc uni = hellhole of endless fire).
I hope everyone's having a really nice december. I'm not. I fucking hate almost everything about decembers. The only thing I do like is the vague sense of expectation in the air. It's like a faint smell of food baking in the oven. I like that but it's so ... undescribable and beyond grasping... kinda makes me sad a bit. That's a feeling I get a lot of during decembers
Winter entry
I nearly had my toes freeze off today so yeah, it is indeed winter. I hate winter. It's neat and cute and there's fluffy blankets and shit but I fucking hate freezing. I hate that tingly sensation you get after being outside for (nowadays; app a minute) too long and the cold sort of polishes off the top layer of your skin.
I don't want to go to uni ever again.
Those few friends I have, annoy me.
I have a ton of books waiting for me and I can't afford to read them because I'm supposed to study and I hate that, too.
Family- . Family is being family.
Tl;dr: yes, I am alive. No, I don't know for how long I'll manage to stay so. Yes, do bl
I'm fine, really. Sorta. Yes, yes. I am.
Thought it was time I wrote another journal entry. You know, just to show a sign of life.
Stuff has been happening all over the place and... Well, the higlights were probably: my best friend dumping uni (and me), me discovering Hannibal nbc (and a wonderful girl who shares my absolute awe for Mads Mikkelsen's hair), having clinic labs and meeting the first doctor that made me want to become like him one day (...perhaps I'll skip the vanilla hair and that funny metro/gay thing he has going on). Oh and it happened that someone actually developed something of a crush on me. That's a first. ...also, it's been 2 years and 6 months now that I've
woho, walking on sunshine again! :D
actually it's quite a storm outside and when i came back earlier, my feet were soaked. wither way, i've at least dealt with exams and now i think there's no chance of failing the year. good girl me. ^^
people still hate me and everything but that i'll deal with later. fuck people. fuck everything. this evening is just my own, to drink massive amounts of tea, watch soapy movie and not give a fuck about a thing. *dances*
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